Part 3: She understands the power of her words to shape and create her world


She understands that her tongue can speak death into her marriage, into her world.

She also understands that her tongue can speak life into her marriage, into her world. It has the power to create, build or destroy.

Proverbs 18:21 NLT

The tongue can bring death or life; those who love to talk will reap the consequences.

Words can build a staircase to heaven or dig a deep pit to hell in your marriage.

She knows this because the Bible says she “speaks with wisdom and faithful instruction is on her tongue”. Proverbs 31:26 NIV. The NLT says “kindness”.

Proverbs 31:26 NLT

When she speaks, her words are wise, and she gives instructions with kindness.

So we can learn from her that we need to speak with:

  1. Wisdom
    We become wise and can speak with wisdom when we begin to truly fear the Lord, when we know Him and have a personal relationship with Him and when we follow His principles.

    We speak with wisdom when it is based on the word of God.

    Psalm 111:10 NIV
    The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom; all who follow his precepts have good understanding. To him belongs eternal praise.

  2. Be faithful in our speech
    “Faithful instruction is on her tongue” means she speaks with kindness, is consistent with the truth, her words are reliable, timely and accurate (she does not leave out important details).

She knows :

  1. When to speak:
    Proverbs 29:20 NIV
    Do you see someone who speaks in haste? There is more hope for a fool than for them.
  2. What to say :
    Ephesians 4:15 NIV
    Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.
  3. How to say it (tone and gesture): Proverbs 15:4 NIV
    The soothing tongue is a tree of life, but a perverse tongue crushes the spirit.
  4. When to be silent :
    Proverbs 10:19 NIV
    Sin is not ended by multiplying words, but the prudent hold their tongues.

    Whilst no one will ever get it right 100% of the time, we can improve all the time.

    What words have you spoken that you need to cancel so that they build your marriage and staircases to heaven? You have that power, it’s in your tongue.