This post I wrote with the help of my husband. We (in the photograph) are from two very different cultures. When we write together we use the identity “Loved Wife, Respected Husband”
Since we got married we adopted a common culture, a Biblical one, as the overriding culture in our lives.
Culture and tradition in general
Culture or Tradition is a beautiful thing. It is a part of our heritage.
In marriage observing culture or tradition can sometimes be a point of contention, strife or worse.
As Christians we can agree that God’s Word is supreme. Therefore culture or tradition should be subject to it and observing it must not contravene it. This means we should test every culture or tradition we are expected to observe against the Bible.
Matthew 15:3 NIV
 Jesus replied, “And why do you break the command of God for the sake of your tradition
Often when emotions run high, one can get confused between not observing culture or tradition because it goes against the Bible and the commandment to honor our parents. God’s Word never contradicts itself so there is no need for confusion or guilt.
Exodus 20:12 NIV
 “Honor your father and your mother, so that you may live long in the land the Lord your God is giving you.
There are those cultural and traditional expectations that we must observe if they do not ontravene the Bible and they honor our parents whether we like to do it or not.
If, however, culture or tradition contravenes the Bible and our parents feel disrespected when we refuse to observe them, we must stand firm but communicate this to them in love and not feel responsible for the offense that they may take.
Ephesians 4:15 NIV
 Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ.
This is not an easy one to navigate, we know and you may upset some people who may have a different world view to your biblical one, but stand firm.
Joshua 24:15 NIV
…But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”
John 14:15 NIV
 “If you love me, keep my commands.
Culture and Tradition others (excluding our parents) expect us to observe
In this case if culture or tradition does not contravene the Bible and family and others expect us to observe them, then we can decide which ones to observe by agreement as husband and wife out of respect. A husband or wife should not force one another to observe culture or tradition they are uncomfortable with.
God bless you,
Loved Wife, Respected Husband